keeping busy/ randomness

I have been keeping myself pretty busy lately on perpose weather it be watching movies or going out these last feew days.

FRIDAY

I went to this new club it had one level which i really enjoyed, nice open area and such with tvs, easy to get around , and u could see where u were going. However the basement is was the compleate opasit. crowded cramped and dark. sadly this is where the rest of the people in the groupe wanted to spend there time. i got pretty shit faced (which was my plan all along). and then we went to dennys to have some food. after that we came home and i put my tired drunk ass to bed

Saturday

Woke up with a hangove obviously. I got on the net and watched cris's graduation online. it was vary nice, and no i dident know she was going to be onstage twice or i would have watched the whole thing :P. as it was after i say her on stage i got out of my chair. my ass was hurting . I then decided to put the last 2 enterprise epasodes into the vcr and watched them

God damn you upn for killing star trek one of the only remaining family friendly shows on tv. everywhere u look its sex this and sex that, and u take one of the only decent shows and u shit can it . oh i know its not just the net work. its the people who watch all theses sexed up shows instead of of decent porograming. u know shit like desperate housewives. you people who watch that shit and ur teenagers watchj that shit. and then u wana bitch and complain when kids are having kids. well no kidding dumb ass this is what happens where every show on tv today uses sex for ratings. . and u people out there that watch these sexed up shows are facilatating premisquity

so in review the people at upn are cock suckers. amd the people that like to watch these rauchy shows r just as bad . i wouldent have a problem with it if so many people wouldent complain about sex on tf, and then thoes same people watch the damn shows anyway. hippacrits

star trek was more then flying through space and meeting new races, and fancy effects IT was about equality for all regardless of race skin color or ability. something hopefull that this world could use now. with the war and so many harte crime going on now adays. BUT no what do they do, they take off a show about hope peace an understanding. and the replace it with a show about the slut and the worthless drugy A.K.A britney spears and kevin federline.

WHAT THE FUCK ARE U PEOPLE THINKING

does anyone really care about thoes two worthless shit bags come on now

Sunday

I decided to begin phase 2 of my excersize progranm, and went and purchased an excersize bike. thats right im trying to make myself a stud. but not for girls. im doing this for me for my helth for my futuyre for my self of steam. to prove that i may be in a wheelchair but im as handsome and sexy as any man that can walk on two legs, (if not more so)

and if thoes girls that wouldent look at me before that styart looking at me when im ripped i swear im gona just look at them right in the eye and say

" you know before u wouldent look at me when i was an average guy in a wheelchair. and now because im all buff you want to talk to me. Well do us both a favor cause im still the same great guy i always have been. only my apearence has changed. now u wana talk to me cause now i fit ur sterotypical ideas of what makes a man good looking , well get lossed cause i dont want anything to do with you"

revenge is a bitch and all these girls who gave me dirty looks cause of the wheelchair will be eating there words in a few short months. except i wont get conceeded im going to remain true to myself . a good decent down to earth man. and thoes that felt i wasent good enough for them will be sad when they realize the kinda man they missed out on

Today

the reason ive been keeping busy and maybe apear to be a tad bit upset . today one year ago my grandfather died. and ive been trying to keep busy so i ddent think about today or how he was in the hospital fighting for life 3 days prior to the day he died, making this whole weekend hard. I miss him a hell of alot and though ive tried to remain busyy so i dont think about it, it hasent worked vary well. you know i figured a year would be plunty of time to not be sad anymore. but what do u do when that year was so busy and it dosent seem like a year. but just a few short blinks of an eye.

I know hes in a better place. i justr mss him.there has been a feeling of lonelyness sice he passed. he understood what it was like to hace cerebral polsey for he had it to, althought not as bad as mine . but atleast there was someone in my family who understands what its like. and i cant help the fact that i feel alone in some ways that i dident before. when he said i coud do something it ment more to me, i believed him more then anyone else. because he wentr through the things i have and he did it. where as someone else can tell me i can do something and its like "how the hell would they know there not in this body they dno what its like"

i looked up to him vary much and still do and theres not a day that goes by where i dont think of him.

i love u papa will see one another again i promise :)